Friday, June 11, 2010
What Is this Need to Create ?
What is the driving force behind it and why is it so important to me? I suppose it stems from the need to express my thoughts and feelings, without having to use the spoken word. Growing up, I had a hard time expressing my feelings. I was afraid of saying the wrong thing, the wrong way and risk being viewed as unintelligent by others. I recall many times when I simply ignored the cruel words of others and was mistakenly labeled as dumb for not catching on to their hurtful intentions, when in reality saying something equally harmful was not in me. I was taught from an early age to treat others the way I would want to be treated and if you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all. I'm not sure what was worse, putting others feelings before mine or not standing up for myself.
Most times I'm in a good place while creating but there are times when life throws me a curve and I use my art to work through it. Blocking everything else out around me, and separating my feelings from the problem suddenly brings clarity to the situation, allowing me to find the answer my heart has been searching for... it's very therapeutic. Through creating I've come to know who Joella is, what makes her tick, what she values most in life and what really makes her happy.
I feel it's important we do what we can to make the world as loving and accepting as we can for ourselves and others. I have developed an overwhelming need to leave something of myself behind for my children and their generation, making their lives richer through my work. Giving hope and inspiration by sharing the secrets I have learned on my journey that have giving me the tools to live an authentic life.
There are many reasons why I create, but the single most important reason is in the knowing that I have touched the hearts and souls of others, and maybe just maybe making their lives a littler more joyful because of it.